Crossing Many Rainbows

Sorry this blog’s been on an unexpected hiatus for like a month.  I’ve got a few asks that need answering, and I’m really sorry I haven’t gotten to them yet.  I just plain haven’t had the spoons to provide decent/coherent answers for you guys.  I’ll be back on track eventually; offline life is just kicking my ass right now and I haven’t had much brain power for anything other than fandoming.

I love you all. <3

Save for random reblogs.

If you’ve sent me an ask, I’ve got it, but I haven’t had the brainpower to respond to it, especially if it was one that required a longer answer/explanation/research.  (Note: there are four in my inbox right now.)

In addition to answering those, I’ve got about three more posts to make, including the wildly long identity post I promised.

This blog will be active again with actual original content eventually. @_@

What do you do when you find yourself unable to meditate?  I can’t seem to concentrate long enough to go under, even though I’m usually pretty good at it.  Meditating in silence isn’t working for me right now, so I decided to find some rhythmic sound loops in hopes that it would help me into trance state, but I’m too scattered for that to even work.

I’m not sure if I’m looking for advice or if I’m just complaining because I can.

It’s possible I’m too tired to meditate—that if I tried, I’d just fall asleep, and my brain is protesting against falling asleep, so it’s doing its damnedest to not let me meditate.    It’s frustrating as hell when I can’t seem to do it, especially when I know I need to.

I think I probably ought to try sleeping now, since that’s not working.  Maybe I’ll have better luck in dreams.

I promise. XD

Though out of curiosity, and I know I’ve asked before, is there anything you guys would like to see on this blog, or anything you’d like to see more of?  I mostly post things here as they strike me, and I wax and wane in what portion of the blog I’m interested in (hence why it has a few different focuses), but I haven’t been using it nearly as much, and I really haven’t been putting much original content here.

I still have to finish the otherkin challenge, and I have a paganism challenge to do after that, but what else do you guys wanna see here?

blackthirteen:

keepyourcorsetstight:

I found a blog for otherkins, which included a list of otherkin bloggers so that otherkins could find other otherkins.

I clicked four of the urls. Three were deleted and one’s last post was like “I’m sorry. You’re right, I’m human. Good bye.”

Great job breaking my heart, Tumblr.

The people who troll the otherkin tag and send hate to these people should be banned from Tumblr. Ugh.

“I’m sorry. You’re right, I’m human. Good bye.”

As a darkling, that’s akin to a suicide note to Me — judged by the level of “oh shit no wait” that My mind employs in response.

To fall into a line that you don’t belong on only because you’ve been pressured to is certainly one kind of death (one that even humans are prey to, depending on how much of themselves they give up for the chance at assimilation).

It is a form of suicide—it’s a sacrifice of identity, and especially when it’s something that’s a huge part of who we are, falling to the pressure of not being that anymore is a kind of death, yes.  To me, it almost seems worse to have a death of the self that occurs separate of the death of the body, and that’s what this amounts to.

There’s so much I want to say about this, but I’m finding it hard to articulate it in a way that makes sense.  Maybe I’ll tackle it again later.

This is just…profoundly distressing, and it’s a real show of what effect the people who attack us (or who attack anyone who doesn’t fit what society considers to be “normal”) can have.  Some people can take it and shrug it off and roll with it.  Some can’t.  And it’s horrible to me that anyone would feel they have to bend to the pressure of being someone they aren’t.

(via formerly-samarkands)